When you know enough about depression and helplessness, acts like suicide can be seen in a new light. While the world rallies around to showcase the futility or the meaninglessness of that ‘selfish’ act, the reality is much different. It’s not about leaving a mother alone or creating life long scars for people. It’s an act, the only act that they feel they have some control over. When everything around is making you do things, when it’s the world against you, some people break. They stop thinking like the rest of the world and absolutely no rationalisation that the rest of the world can come up with is lost. The helplessness is paramount and suicide became the only act for them to show that they still have some control over their life. Or their death.
We judge them, we trivialize the reasons for someone committing suicide. We come up with hundred other things that they could have done. But depression and helplessness are not small. They are medical conditions. Not many people understand depression, the tunnel vision that comes up with that. People call or”attention-seeking”, “selfish”, “sleeping all day” and if we try supporting them, we are” spoiling them”.
If someone committed suicide, just feel bad that we as a society have failed. Analyse why someone did that so that we can help someone in the future. Not to identify the hundred other things they could have done to avoid committing suicide. There wasn’t hundred options, to him or her there was just one. Empathise with that. We have people around us for whom suicide is not a concept that needs analysing. For them it is very real.
Our patronizing shit about suicide will just make someone else feel that most of the world do not understand them. We are giving more reasons to alienate people.
Suicide is not trivial. For some it’s the one and only act in their control. Talk, understand, help.
Stop judging or giving alternatives.
PS: Read the comments on the original Facebook Post. They are quite enlightening.